1. |
The Creator
03:14
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They'll lay me down
Into my grave
And burn the sound
In Nothing's name
Hear the wedding bells
The church is aflame
Soak the pretty flowers
In my kerosene
I am a ghost
Of simple ways
My selfish host
Hoards all the pain
You pin my arms against the clay
You pierce my heart
And I'm not the same
I am a ghost
You are my host
I am what
You created
You created me.
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2. |
Without Me
04:55
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My hate unleashed
Bought the casket that I'm in
This pain I feel
Could it wash away my sins?
These walls that I've climbed
So many times before
Are on my mind
As I fall to the floor
I'm the same, I know
I'll sleep when I'm dead
Or be a lover in your bed
Just a fading memory
When you're without me
I'd hate to be the one
Who falls apart just this once
You know you don't mean anything
When you're without me
I'm on the edge
Of everything that's sane
This old hotel
Hides the secrets that you keep
As I walk alone
Down this empty street
My shame still shows
I'm collapsing at your feet
I'm not a saint, I know
I pretend as I waste my time
When was the last time that I felt alive?
Some say only the strong survive
But should I go before my time?
I'll sleep when I'm dead
Or be a lover in your bed
Just a fading memory
When you're without me
I'd hate to be the one
Who falls apart just this once
You know you don't mean anything
When you're without me
You're without me.
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3. |
Crawl
06:16
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Alone
I crawl
To you
I'm cold
You're warm
My bones
I can't feel you
With you I feel alive, alive
Please let me crawl inside
These words eat me alive, alive
I can't run this time
Hide
Don't breathe
Save me
Lie to me
Please
My hate
Your pain
I know it won't kill you
These chains
Please abstain
The drugs
They won't please you
You violate me
But you can't stand to see me cry
Denigrate me
Just to laugh as I lose my mind
Emaciate me
But I still refuse to die
Humiliate me
But I won't let you win this time
This time
You die
With you I feel alive, alive
Please let me crawl inside
These words eat me alive, alive
I won't run this time
This time.
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4. |
Safe And Sound
04:56
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When you're safe and sound
The walls come down
I'm sitting here alone
'Cus you won't be coming home
We're echoing the sound
As the world comes down
You're sitting there alone
And I won't be coming home
No, I won't be coming home
There's nothing left of me
To feed your vacant memories
It just wasn't meant to be
She said
I cross the empty lane
On the road you wouldn't take
Maybe we'll meet again one day
She said
These wounds mean nothing
I'm failing now
What will it take for you to see?
When you're safe and sound
The walls come down
I'm sitting here alone
'Cus you won't be coming home
We're echoing the sound
As the world comes down
You're sitting there alone
And I won't be coming home
No, I won't be coming home
I'm dwelling in the womb
Of a beast that's been abused
This is no place for boys
She said
When love is left alone
It never keeps its pain unknown
You're just a broken consequence
She said
These wounds mean nothing
I'm failing now
How can you kill a memory?
When you're safe and sound
The walls come down
I'm sitting here alone
'Cus you won't be coming home
We're echoing the sound
As the world comes down
You're sitting there alone
And I won't be coming home
No, I won't be coming home
You drive away (I don't feel alive)
We're worlds away (I see through your lies)
My pain never fades (It hurts inside)
Why does it end this way?
We're echoing the sound
As the world comes down
You're sitting there alone
And I won't be coming home
No, I won't be coming home
No, I won't be coming home
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5. |
Summer Nights
05:42
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I won't let you get too close
I'm addicted to being alone
All the scars were etched in me
By forgotten memories
I'm too old to let it go
Lost inside a setting sun
That's burned away what's left of me
The quiet boy I used to be
The wolves in my head won't stop
And the bills keep adding up
I guess it's how it will always be
But it's killing what's left of me
We never really had enough
It forced a kid to be grown up
You walked away from us that day
You lied and threw it all away
You just threw us both away
You just threw it all away
The summer nights are haunting me
It's so hot I can barely breathe
Get in the car and run away
Burn down the house
We'll find a way
Nothing is really how it seems
A small fire is all we need
We'll start again some other place
Where the nights won't keep us awake
The summer nights won't keep us awake
She works all day a job she hates
And cleans big houses until late
But it still isn't adding up
The landlord has had enough
She knocks on doors every other week
Selling phone books for cheap
Her sister says that she has it easy
Her mother hates her 'cus she isn't
Who she wants her to be
The words they burn her like gasoline
The summer nights are haunting me
It's so hot I can barely breathe
Get in the car and run away
Burn down the house
We'll find a way
Nothing is really how it seems
A small fire is all we need
We'll start again some other place
Where the nights won't keep us awake
The summer nights won't keep us awake
Your words fall short
You know they do
The lies you told
They haunt me still
And after all
We have been through
I'm all alone
Because of you
Because of you (summer nights won't keep us awake)
I'll just become somebody else.
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6. |
Misery
03:53
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You know me
I'm misery
Cascading waves
Of emery
Discard my face
Erase the effigies
Until the world's a forgotten memory
Burn these words
Into my heart
Wind me back
To the start
Verse 2
She knows me
I'm misery
A broken heart
A haunted memory
Burn everything
Forsake the liturgy
Until the saints all cry out heresy
Burn these words
Into my heart
Wind me back
To the start
Every second I go away
The pills they keep me in place
Every minute I lie in wait
The bills they keep me awake
Every hour I feel this way
The fear kills me day by day
Everything I am today
Today, today, today, today
Is not enough (not enough)
I know you
You're misery
A scarring flame that never fades
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7. |
The Great Divide
02:21
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I will wait
And bide my time
I still hate
Who I am inside
These dark thoughts
Race through my mind
I can't take
Another day
Why was it never enough?
I won't be your lie.
Take my hate
Take my pain
Take my shame
Take my name
I hope you choke.
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8. |
Poison / The Cure
06:14
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We lost souls walk in the night
We'll never be all right
Your poison is my life's pain
Someone drain it from my
Ice cold veins
I'm lying in the depths
Of this hell that I've built
I've forgotten what it's like
To live without hurt
Your face remains the phantom
Who haunts me in my dreams
My skin begs for your tainted touch
So I don't suffer in my sleep
I'm lost in your lying eyes
Wishing I could spend the night
Inside your vacant soul
Let's dance like we're dead tonight
Self-destruction never felt so right
Your poison's too deep to cure
I'm crawling through what's left
Of the house that we built
Looking for the faintest light
To guide me through the dirt
Your voice envelops me
Through memories in my head
You broke me down long ago
And left me here for dead
I'm lost in your lying eyes
Wishing I could spend the night
Inside your vacant soul
Let's dance like we're dead tonight
Self-destruction never felt so right
Your poison's too deep to cure
You hung these words around my neck
You dug this knife into my back
And now this pain is all I have
My hate for you will never end
It never ends.
I'm lost in your lying eyes
Wishing I could spend the night
Inside your vacant soul
Let's dance like we're dead tonight
Self-destruction never felt so right
Your poison's too deep to cure
Too deep to cure
Too deep to cure
Let's dance like we're dead tonight
Self-destruction never felt so right
Your poison's too deep to cure
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9. |
Ghosts Of My Memory
05:39
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I stand here at the scene
Of a distant memory
Your words being to fade
Maybe they were said in vain
I've found all that's real
Isn't what I want feel
No, the stars will never fade
Yet the nights still slip away
Waiting on my own
By the lake you used to go
All the embers fade away
But I think I've come too late
I throw these words to the sky above
Was it all done in vain?
Am I the one who is ashamed?
The one who is ashamed
Am I the one who is ashamed?
You haunt me
In the night
Your face remains
Ingrained the same
Disarm me
With your eyes
I curse the days
I still remain
Is time standing still?
Some days it feels all too real
Is this all I'll ever be
A little boy lost at sea?
I used to be a different kid
Unafraid to let this live
No the ghosts will never fade
In my mind they never leave
In my mind they never leave
In my mind they never leave
You haunt me
In the night
Your face remains
Ingrained the same
Disarm me
With your eyes
I curse the days
I still remain
Why do I feel so hollow?
Why do I run from the
Emptiness you left
All those years ago
Put to rest
Without us
I don't know what's real
Maybe I'm afraid to let this heal
The words will always change
Yet the story ends the same
Yet the story ends the same
Yet the story ends the same
You haunt me
In the night
Your face remains
Ingrained the same
Disarm me
With your eyes
I curse the days
I still remain
You haunt me
In the night
Your face remains
Ingrained the same
Disarm me
With your eyes
I curse the days
I still remain.
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10. |
Cyanide Caress
06:10
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I pick my wounds
To help pass the time
Caressing scars
With cyanide
I hang my thoughts
With wired lines
It's getting old
Putting up a fight
I only look
For places to hide
Trapped inside the thoughts
Of my own denial
I lose myself
In this devil's night
Left alone in a hell
Built on your lies
Please save me
From this dark dream
That is pulling me down
(I forget what it's like)
My sanity
Is escaping me
Can you help me now?
(It's getting worse all the time)
These thoughts
Are all I know
(Someone save me from this nightmare)
Will you
Help me
Let them go?
I break apart
As the days slip by
Decomposing flesh
Of my own mind
It ebbs and flows
Under fluorescent light
Loneliness is a fate
I no longer fight
Please save me
From this dark dream
That is pulling me down
(I forget what it's like)
My sanity
Is escaping me
Can you help me now?
(It's getting worse all the time)
These thoughts
Are all I know
(Someone save me from this nightmare)
Will you
Help me
Let them go?
Do you hate me now
Like I hate me now?
Can you kill the pain?
Can you make it fade?
Will you save me from
This vain charade?
Crash through the walls
If I only knew
It's easier to say
That you can escape your pain
When the dark is all you know
It's too hard to let it go
The things they say to you
It tells you nothing new
The hope you thought was gone
Will never leave your heart
Please save me
From this dark dream
That is pulling me down
(I forget what it's like)
My sanity
Is escaping me
Can you help me now?
(It's getting worse all the time)
These thoughts
Are all I know
(Someone save me from this nightmare)
Will you
Help me
Let them go?
Will you help me let them go?
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11. |
Shame
04:15
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I hope these fears
Will start to fade
Every day I feel ashamed
All this time
My mind's gone blank
You're never safe
When you're afraid
And I can't take this anymore
These wounds
Are cut too deep to ignore
But I won't feel ashamed anymore
The nights are long
They just can't wait
To pull you down
And make you beg
Hear these words
They've come too late
It's all I know
Am I too late?
But I can't take this anymore
These wounds
Are cut too deep to ignore
My hate
Burns down into my core
This pain
Is it what I'm fighting for?
But I won't feel ashamed anymore.
Anymore.
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12. |
The Last Goodbye
07:21
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I walk the streets at night
'cus it makes me feel all right
I feel the moon burn holes
Through my vacant eyes
She touches me with a cold stare
That could make a grown man cry
I'm on my knees
I'll kiss the ring
It's my disease
My hopeless
Calls to the deep
Fall short on your alibi
I'm nothing
She shouts out to me
As I try to break her fall
The time spent
Tracing your veins
With pin pricks that bleed you dry
The hardest
Part of this is saying the last goodbye
I pace the alleys in the city
Everyone else seems to despise
I race through my mind
And hope that she won't pass me by
The hours wane quickly
I'm counting the minutes crawl up my spine
What a pity I can't
Get out this time
My hopeless
Calls to the deep
Fall short on your alibi
I'm nothing
She shouts out to me
As I try to break her fall
The time spent
Tracing your veins
With pin pricks that bleed you dry
The hardest
Part of this is saying the last goodbye
I'm running
The time spent
It pulls me down
You're holding me down
Escape the days left
It's all we have
I'm all you have
You drag me down
And break me
You break me
Tonight
One kiss goodbye
You hate me
I hate me
Tonight
Tonight.
It's 12 AM
And you're so far away
Just one moment
Since you went astray
Red roses
Blanket you in your grave
Without you here
I am not the same
I am not the same (I am a ghost/You are my host)
I am not the same. (I won't be your lie)
My hopeless
Calls to the deep
Fall short on your alibi
I'm nothing
She shouts out to me
As I try to break her fall
The time spent
Tracing your veins
With pin pricks that bleed you dry
The hardest
Part of this is saying the last goodbye
I am not the same.
I won't be your lie.
I am a ghost
You are my ghost
I am what you created.
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ILL-ADVISED New Jersey
Harry Metzler is ILL-ADVISED. A multi-instrumentalist, songwriter, and producer.
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